Resting B*tch Face

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I have to approach others because it’s rare that they approach me. I’ve been told that I’m mysterious and intimidating, which never fails to make my 5-foot frame shake with laughter.
I’m convinced that this all comes down to my impressive Resting Bitch Face. By definition, this phrase is what explains for many of us why people constantly suggest that we smile more or ask if someone’s having a tough day when all you did was walk by. You weren’t smiling and your expression may have sunken down a bit, illustrating this bitchy persona. It’s natural and common; there’s a name for it and everything.
Anatomically speaking, “it takes more muscles to frown than to smile,” but there is something exhausting about smiling. You’ve experienced that weighted feeling as your cheeks begin to quiver with too much exertion just as I have. It’s only a matter of time before gravity or our loss of faith in humanity weighs it back down.
It’s really not as big of an epidemic as people and the general internet are dramatizing it to be. I prefer people with Resting Bitch Face because I know they’re not going to sugar coat things for no apparent reason. I feel I can trust these people. Momma didn’t teach me to befriend liars or trust gargoyles… gargoyles are fake… that took on a whole new layer without intention.
At this point I should be proposing some kind of solution. The easy answer is to smile more but, in case my bias has yet to make an impression, I think it’s fine if you don’t.
There’s really no reason to smile constantly. Rule of thumb that I’ve picked up is that you should always smile if you make eye contact with somebody, but if there wasn’t any kind of connection between you and a stranger to begin with then it’s fine if you just save it for later.
Additionally, it seems as though any time the term “bitch” is involved, it applies only to women. Fair, it’s derived from the word’s origin which was to describe a female dog, but do men ever “suffer” from the condition? Not really, it’s just their face.
Well maybe it’s just my face too.
Keep frowning, ladies.


I'm Alexea Malaletkin, currently residing in Southern California where I waste weekends either on my couch or at concert venues. I currently work as an editor for my school newspaper and will be majoring in either journalism or English language this fall. I am a food, internet, and rainy day enthusiast with a fervor for makeup and fashion. I draw a lot of inspiration from art, music, and movies-- all of which will most certainly make an appearance in my work here. Keep up with me on Instagram (malaletkin7) and Tumblr (