Relationship Tips A-Z
A) You don’t always have to have the final word. Ladies, we know, it’s so hard sometimes to just shut up and drop something that is bothering you. Women are right a lot of the time, obviously. Sometimes it’s just better to avoid more conflict and, most importantly, a day spent fighting. Enjoy your day instead of spending it pouting and just drop the situation.
B) Don’t tell your girlfriends every detail of your love life. We are very aware of how tempting it is to divulge the juicy stuff on girl’s night. Wether you are wishing you could vent about how stupid he is for getting mad over an itsy bitsy issue or talking about how annoying he can be, your friends, as messed up as it may be, may share this information and your complaints with other people. His friends, his parents, him, your acquaintances, or even people you have never met may hear about these complaints. You don’t want other people having pre-concieved notions about your relationship and gossiping about how you hate your boyfriend because you had a little disagreement. You also don’t want people thinking he’s a jerk! If you are upset in the moment, vent to your mom or your sister. Be careful about sharing too much with others. It may bite you in the butt! If you share your juciest sex experiences or your most intimate conversations and dates, it takes the privacy and intimacy that was so special to you out of the moment. The last thing you want is some rumor spreading around that “Kate & Mike ‘did it’ on the beach after he had a candlelit dinner ready for her”, right? That can get a little awkward.
C) Ask your guy to keep some things quiet too. Guys talk (more than we’d like to know). It is no one else’s business “how far” you have or haven’t gone. Ask him to respect that and keep your life in the bedroom, as well as your secrets, private! Privacy and respecting privacy is a very important part of a relationship. If he can’t respect the fact that you don’t want him telling his friends how good you are in bed, he probably isn’t the right guy.
D) Don’t fight in public. Chances are there will be someone around that will know you and notice the obvious tension. They may even comment on your behavior. It’s healthy to fight sometimes, just do it in your own privacy and not in line at Mickey-D’s while you’re getting chicken nuggets, okay?
E) Be nice to his friends. It goes a LONG way in both their eyes and your man’s eyes. If his friends like you, hat’s off to you! He is more likely to wan to spend time with you can hang with his friends. It will be a more successful relationship on both ends. No one likes a bitchy girlfriend who doesn’t like her guy’s friends and doesn’t want him to hang around them. All that leads to is his friends resenting the girl and the girl resenting the friends.
F) Don’t send “explicit” (uh-hum nudes, your titties, full body mirror shots, videos, video snapchats, snapchats, especially none of the above with your face in it, etc.) As sad as it is, couples do break up and decide that they aren’t right for one another. If things don’t end on a good note, you don’ want to leave any incriminating evidence trailing behind you. A collection of explicit photos is the exact, incriminating evidence I’m talking about. It’s easier when someone is angry to send a photo like that than to delete it. It happens all the time where girls send nude photos and they end up getting sent around entire schools, communities, and even can be spread online through social media like Facebook and Instagram or on adult websites. It is very hard to get rid of those photos and they can mess up your future in some cases.
G) Don’t make him embarrassed in front of people just to embarrass him in front of people. Poking a little fun is all cool, but some things are really embarrassing and shouldn’t really be shared out loud. Just like you wouldn’t want him telling your friends about the time you had toilet paper hanging out of the back of your jeans or the time you squirt milk out of your nose, it goes both ways. He does care about what people think about him, even if he doesn’t act like it. It’s different to tell your girlfriends about all of the flowers and teddy bears he bought you and the fabulous dinner he spent 3 hours cooking for you than to tell his friends about it. His friends would most likely start whipping him with towels are make whip sounds *wahh-chhh!* Acknowledge his awesomeness, but don’t share every detail. With his friends, keep things simple.
H) It’s okay to stand up for yourself. If he gangs up on you or says something that bothers you, it’s important to let him know. It’s like when guys say “that’s gay” for one example. Well, what makes not being able to go get food because a restaurant is closed “gay”? Or what makes losing a game “gay”? There is nothing “happy” or “homosexual” about it. If it bothers you, let him know. If he consistently says something you don’t like, it’s important to share that with him. Suggest a new word or tell him that it really bothers you. Communication is key!
I) Don’t be too clingy. It bothers guys thinking they have to talk to you 24/7, 7 days a week. He likes you a lot and cares about you, but making guys feel trapped and like they can’t talk to anyone else seems to drive them crazy. It’s okay to talk a lot, but some space isn’ necessarily a bad thing. When you’re in class or at work, try to focus on that and tell him you’ll talk to him right after. It gives you a healthy separation, but you still have tons of time to chat with your boo.
J) Keep your girls! You will ALWAYS need girlfriends even if you have a man. Go grab dinner and see a movie. Go shopping. Tan. Do all the things your boyfriend dreads doing because that’s what girlfriends are for! Every girl needs a shoe shopping buddy and, let me just tell you, men don’t love shoe shopping.
K) All men are jealous. If you have a guy best friend, they will be jealous. If you have friends that are guys that you consider to be like brothers, they will still be jealous. If you text guys a lot, comment and like statuses and photos, speak regularly, and (god forbid) have conversations over a phone call, he will be jealous. Acknowledge that now. You have to work with it. If he gets frustrated, just know that (again) he loves you very much and that’s why he cares so much.
L) With “K” said, you shouldn’t have to sneak around or ditch your guy friends. Bring your boy around them, make them feel more comfortable. Acknowledge how it may not be ideal, but that their friendships are important to you. Ask him to respect that and that you would never ask him to stop hanging to with something unless there was a very important reason. If there is a particular, very important reason he doesn’t want you hanging around someone though (beyond just jealousy), consider his thoughts.
M) If you don’t love him, wait to say those magical 3 words. This one is pretty self-explanatory. If you don’t think that you’re ready, it’s okay to wait until you are. If you don’t want to casually throw out “I love you”, there is no problem with that. I am sure that he will understand.
N) Let him know when you need some alone time. It is perfectly fine to have one day a week where you say you need a date night. He’ll understand most likely and it’ll benefit you both. Spend a day with your man without any distractions. Have movie night together on Saturday nights or go to Taco Tuesdays on Tuesday. Whatever works with the two of you.
O) Watch movies you both like. As weird as it sounds, every once and a while your man doesn’t want to watch Ryan Gosling take his shirt off in a chick flick. Even stranger than that, you probably don’t want to watch hot girls ride motorcycles. Agree on something! It’s all about compromise and watching something you both want to watch.
Q) You don’t have to share all of your love via social media. Paragraphs and paragraphs about why you love him is sort of gross for everyone else to read. It seems like you are overcompensating for something else. Tell him! Not the world. No one else, as surprised as you may be, wants to hear all of the 10 billion reasons why you love each other and why you want to be his wife and see all your cute kissing pictures, blah blah blah. Stick to keeping one your screensaver, but no one needs to see 100 pictures of you guys making out.
R) Realize that you’re beautiful and he knows it. He will always ben thinking “I am the luckiest man in the world” even if you don’t feel beautiful that day. You may think that you look ugly that day or that you don’t look good in sweatpants, but he doesn’t think either of those things. He thinks you’re beautiful the way you are.
S) Men love sex- and they love when you do too. If you are at this level, this is for you. If you’re not, disregard this one. You don’t have to fake pleasure, but you should enjoy yourself. Let go, have fun!
T) Social media is public. If he does something you can see, everything you do he can also see. If you are posting things that you know would bother him, he’s going to see the. It’s the same as commenting and liking pictures. If you can see that he is commenting and liking pictures he shouldn’t be, he can tell if you are too. Nothing is totally private any more and it’s important to realize that.
U) Family approval is crucial. Spend time with his mom, eat dinner with his family, and try to make an effort to cheer his sister on at that soccer game. If his parents like you, it’s much easier to have a successful relationship.
V) Sometimes you look sexiest in jeans and a tank top. Sometimes you look best in jeans, a tank top, no makeup, and with a messy bun. You don’t have to always be done up. It’s good to let loose and be comfy. Confidence is sexy. You don’t always need lipgloss and push up bras to have him tell you you’re beautiful.
W) Do what the boys do. Learn to play his favorite video game, indulge his childishness and grab a western bacon cheeseburger or play a game of basebll. It’s so much more fun when you let loose and enjoy yourself.
X) Never cheat and do not tolerate cheating. Cheating is never fair in any situation or relationship and is very hurtful. If you feel the need to cheat, it’s a sign you shouldn’t be committed to the person you’re with. If you want to cheat, break it off and save a lot of hurt. If he cheats, don’t give him a second chance. As harsh as that sounds, if you give him another chance it gives him so much leeway and makes it easy to justify his decision.
Y) Don’t be that party girl. It’s not that hot to act slutty and drink and wear hoochy clothes. It shows a serious lack of commitment in people’s eyes, in his eyes, because it’s really easy to cheat and make mistakes if you’re constantly drinking. If you tone it down a little bit and party with your man instead of on your own, you’ll probably get along better.
Fashion fanatic, coffee connoisseur, and lover of the finer things in life! Living life every day to its fullest and writing about it. It's more fun to find little mom and pop coffee shops than sit at Starbucks all day long.